Tuesday - November 27, 2007

Battle Report : Recon 

So, this weekend, we designated Saturday as "Warhammer 40K Day." And it was good!

We started off around noon. Josh, Carl, and I all met over at Ed's place, and got right down to brass tacks. Josh brought a huge box of disused AV equipment (a few VRCs, a CD player, an old boom box) that no longer worked, and we spent a few hours ripping them apart for interesting bits to use for terrain. While Josh and Carl continued with that, Ed and I stopped up at Home Depot and picked up a 4x8 board of pink insulation foam to use as a game board. It didn't fit in the car, so we ended up hacking it up into 2x4 slabs. I thought that would cripple its usefulness, but as it turns out, it actually made it MORE modular. We were able to put 3 of the 4 slabs side by side for a 4x6 board, and covered it in green velvet from the poker party... it made the perfect grass!

We agreed to play our game by the book : So we randomly rolled a scenario, and it came up "Recon." Basically, a recon game involves trying to move your team from one side of the board to the other. However, the definitive answer to the age old question, "Why didn't the Tau cross the road," is "Because the Necrons and Tyranids killed them on their way over." And visa versa. Hence, the difficulty of the scenario.

Looking at what we all had to work with, we decided on 1500 points per side (that's a small-to-medium sized game, for those of you not savvy). Carl and I teamed up with 750 points each, and Ed and Josh combined their Tau into one massive 1500 point army.

Team Good :

• 2 Hammerhead Tanks (one with rail gun, one with ion cannon)
• 2 Broadside Battlesuits
• 1 Squad of angry Kroot Carnivores
• 2 Squads of Fire Warriors
• 1 Squad of Pathfinders w/ Devilfish Transport
• 2 Crisis Suits w/ Shield Drones
• 3 Piranhas (not pictured here)
• 1 Pack of Marlboro Lights

Team Evil : Tyranids

• 3 Warriors (Hive Mind)
• 15 Gaunts w/ Flesh Borers
• 8 Genestealers
• 1 Lictor
• 1 Shoveltusker Carnifex who was never loved as a child

Team Evil : Necrons

• 1 Necron Lord w/ Lightning Generator, Gaze of Flame, Rez Orb
• 2 Squads of Warriors
• 3 Heavy Destroyers
• Roguish Good Looks :)

The table was set... on the outskirts of an urban area, a Tau recon patrol catches news from their sensor posts of a Tyranid scout patrol heading that way on foot. But, little did they now that lurking in the shadows were the terrible Necrons. Seeing the opportunity to sew havoc and terror into the inhabitants of this world, the Necrons waited until the Tau saw the small and easily defeated Tyranid patrol... and teleported in to join the fray!

Team Good won the roll at the beginning of the game, and chose to go first.

Ouch.

The first round was a brutal barrage of shooting from the Tau Empire's mighty cannons. The fighting was not pretty. The Piranhas streaked in, leaving the Tyranid Warriors - their only Synapse Creatures keeping the Gaunts in check - suffered grievous losses. All but one died, and was sent limping into the tank traps for cover as he leaked yellow blood onto the ground. The Carnifex was lit up like a Christmas tree by all the Tau Markerlights, and laser-guided missiles bombarded his thick armored chitin among other arms fire, ion cannons, and a massive rail gun. Still, though, the Carnifex limped forth menacingly, refusing to be taken down by even this impressive display of power. The collective Team Evil forces moved forward, trying to get within their short range so they could take the battle to the Tau.

Turn two served almost as poorly for Team Evil, seeing the Carnifex, last remaining Tyranid Warrior, and all three Necron Heavy Destroyers fall. The loss of the hive mind frightened and confused the mindless Gaunts, who turned and ran when suddenly their thoughts were no longer spoon-fed to them.

This, however, was where the tables turned, as the Necrons plan began to unfold; Hide behind the big scary Carnifex until it dies, and by then, you'll be in range to unleash hell with your gauss flayers. It worked perfectly. The Necrons ignored the squads of infantry, and instead, focused their fire on the massive Hammerhead tank with the ion cannon. The sheer volume of heavy fire that weapon could put out posed the largest threat, and had to go. The only problem was, all I had was small arms... but, they were Gauss weapons!

Gauss weapons, for those not knowledgeable in Necrons, are superior at punching through vehicle armor. Even if the weapon isn't strong enough to technically penetrate the hull by normal rules, if I roll a six, I still get a glancing hit - not great, but FAR greater than nothing.

And this is why I love Josh. As you can see, I rolled 7 sixes, and Josh (who's tank it was) spent the next 5 minutes congratulating me on a job well done. Needless to say, when rolling 6 glancing blows against a single tank...

After that, things deteriorated into close combat. This wasn't great for my Necrons... but it was exactly what the Tyranid Genestealers were waiting for. Slavering, clawed, scythed taloned beasts of nightmare, genetically engineered to kill, charged forth into the unit of Fire Warriors. The Tau tried desperately to diminish their number before they reached them, but to no avail, killing only 4 of the 8. It simply didn't prove to be enough. In the preceding turns, the Genestealer brood took only one more loss at the hands of the Fire Warriors, which they devoured, rended, and eviscerated to their last number. 10 kills for 1 casualty is good in anyone's book.

It was clear Team Evil wasn't going to win this one... but we were damned well going to try!

The Necrons were pretty much wrapped up into rounds upon rounds of melee combat with the Kroot Carnivores, so they were mostly out of the battle. Two other things, however, made the game totally worth finishing, and they both came from Carl's Tyranids!

The first thing was a strange fluke, where a random, mindless, frightened Gaunt shot down and killed the Pathfinders' Devil Fish, slaying all 8 of them in the process. The Pathfinders saw that they could be of little more use attacking the enemy, so they all decided to pile back into the troop transport, and maneuver their skimmer from the top of the building to Team Evil's deployment zone. However, in a brain-fart moment on Team Good's side, they put the Devil Fish 11" away from the Gaunts, with the paper-thin rear armor facing them.

Carl stood looking at the table, witnessing our troops falling, and seeing our chances at winning going from small to infinitesimal... and then furrowed his brow in thought. Hesitantly, he grabbed the tape measure, and said, "I.... I think I can shoot that. How do I shoot this?" Sure enough, five of his Gaunts were within range of the Devil Fish.

Dice hit the table, and an amazing thing happened... The living ammunition the Tyranids had loaded found their mark, and destroyed one of the engines, immobilizing the vehicle. BUT WAIT! Josh had rolled that result, and it was supposed to be OUR roll to make! We tossed the dice, and destroyed one of the engines, immobilizing the vehicle! BUT WAIT AGAIN! Ed sited that the Devil Fish had Decoy Launchers installed on it, and we had to reroll the result! Dice hit the table again, and destroyed one of the engines, immobilizing the vehicle!

And what happens to something that flies when it's immobilized?

This:

Mindless Gaunts : 1, Pathfinders : 0

Then, we come to our MVP of the day : Genestealer #8. The Genestealers took 50% losses from the withering hail of pulse rifle fire as they charged the Fire Warriors, and then utterly disassembled them in close combat. The three remaining Genestealers turned their attention to the two Broadside Battlesuits, hoping to help the Lictor overwhelm them. As it stood, the Lictor was in a standstill with the two Broadsides; The Lictor was far too skilled and maneuverable in close combat for the Broadsides to deal with, and the Broadsides' armor was too thick for the Lictor to penetrate! Perhaps 9 extra attacks per round with Rending Claws would help.

Above the Lictor and Broadsides, however, were the Crisis Command Suits, Shield Drones and all. Seeing the slathering monstrosities hurtling towards their brothers, covered in Tau viscera, they hurled everything they could muster at the Genestealers.

Like the hero of every 20th century action flick, Genestealer #8 ran as fast and as hard as he could as bullet, beam, missile, and explosion flew past him second by long second. Two of his brothers fell, leaving him the one remaining member of his brood to do their dark deed. Ignoring the chaos unleashed by the cannons around him, he leapt upon the Broadside, and began tearing off armor trying to get to the gooey filing on the inside. At the end of the game, the Lictor was dead, and this one lone Genestealer still defiantly clawed at the last Broadside suit.

So that's it! As the Tau mopped up the remainder of Team Evil's forces, their commander, perched safely in his Crisis Suit atop the overhang, surveyed the wreckage of the battlefield. They had one the day... but at what great cost?