Friday - January 25, 2008

Isn't that ... my bed? 

This is nothing really new... in fact, it's more or less a regular occurrence, but it was bad enough last night I feel I need to write about it.

In my home, I am treated as a second-class citizen. I am not afforded the other basic rights and privileges other human beings enjoy on a daily basis. You see, when discussing the needs of any living creature, amidst the likes of food and water, you'll discover shelter is also one of these needs. Now, I may be interpreting this a little loosely here, but isn't a place to rest your head a part of that shelter? Am I not, as a living being, entitled to a bed?

I thought so to.

Apparently, others in my home feel otherwise, and have gathered together in a fast conspiracy to edge me out. Allow me to give you an example:

The time : Last night, about 1am. I'm finally strolling off to bed. I get done petting Paradox, who had been camped out on the back of my chair, and meander off to bed. I start to step onto the stool so I can climb over Megan to get to the far side, when I notice Smilely staring up at me from the foot of Meg's side of the bed. Meg has sprawled herself diagonally across both sides of the bed, presumably to give Smilely more room.

So, I go to attempt to wedge myself in, and am moderately successful at cramming myself between Meg and the wall, and wrestling enough blankets out from under her to cover myself. (That's the other fun thing about sleeping with Megan - I'm never sure if I'm going to be prying the covers out from under her, or bemoaning the fact that I'm overheating because there are 10 extra blankets on the bed) I wedge myself in there, and stretch out my legs, and hear an annoyed little, "mrow!" from Dom, who's camped out where my feet are supposed to go, as if to say, "Hey! I'm trying to sleep here!"

Then I made my fatal mistake... I took stock of the resources I had at hand. "I'm crammed in at an odd angle, can't stretch my legs out, and I only kinda have blankets covering me... at least I still have my pillow!"

Did I mention, Smilely can hear thoughts? Did I likewise mention that Smilely thinks the pillows are hers?

I heard it before I felt it... purrrrrrr.... purrrrrr. Many of the witnesses say it sounded like a freight train. Then, the stick feet. First up the leg, then the side (taking great care to step on my kidney, of course) then down between Meg's and my bodies, and plop, right onto my pillow. It wouldn't have been so bad, then, except Smilely is so happy to see me, that she purrs loudly and feels the need to lick every exposed piece of skin that comes within a foot of her. Usually this doesn't include the face. Tonight, it didn't, but she was licking my eye the other night, so it's not unheard of. Tonight, it was the typical hand-washing ritual. *sigh*

Eventually, Dom wandered off, Meg rolled over, and Smilely isn't really that hard to deal with on the pillow - it's a large pillow, after all. I did get sleep. But I had to work for it. Who's bed is it, anyway!?